Posted on by ijeomaopara · 1 Comment

Speaking to the soul (amongst other things)

A year and a half into this PhD journey, I am at that stage where I can see where I fulfilled the goals I set, and the ones that have to be adjusted. Between me, myself and I, everything feels a bit messy lump of tangled deadlines that seem to grow longer with each passing day. But, against the backdrop of having presented at local and international conferences this month, making worthwhile connections within my field, and meeting some amazing radical feminists, I can’t help but feel a divide between what I see and what I feel. That divide is further complicated when I consider the difference between how many of us may feel internally about our progress, and how others see our achievements. But I think for many overachievers (and people who tend to be hard on themselves), by the time you accept the one accolade, your mind has already moved on to the next thing to accomplish. 

So for this blog, I thought I could reflect on what it means to feel dissonance between who we are and how others see us. I am not the first person to have this thought, but I think it’d be worth it to look at it from my perspective. What does it mean when we are functioning at our highest self? Why do we worry about who we are around others? Especially when we’re not all meant to be in the same space? I often have to remind myself that even if it’s not exactly how I thought it would turn out at the time, that 15-year-old Ijeoma would be so amazed at this current version of Ijeoma (and slightly in awe). Someone once said that we often work to make our inner child happy, and I can’t help but feel like this is the most important thing to me regardless of what I do. My funny, thoughtful, caring side deserves tending to, which means letting go of trying to extend that to everyone you come across. Making others comfortable in a space is a very valuable skill, but it took some time to realise that one does not have to centre your life around being universally palatable. 

It’s also not lost on me that August is Women’s Month in South Africa. When I reflect on what empowerment means to me today, it no longer holds weight when I think about my womanhood. Especially when we see how empowerment serves as lip service to ensure inequality remains the status quo, and the word itself functions as palatable activism to achieve superficial institutional and organisational objectives and goals. Defining who I am as a woman becomes about the integrity and principle behind each action and decision that is made towards my own and others’ emancipation. And that’s where I find myself most times – attempting to fuse these floating parts that feel like they operate in isolation from each other. But the funny thing is that in most cases, everything is connected. In Japan, their philosophy of Ikigai centres around your reason for being; the thing that drives who you are, your essence and purpose. If we know that we all have individual gifts, then it makes sense that it is up to us to indulge in the life-long journey of slowly unwrapping it – and then presenting it to the world. 

So it’s okay for others not to get it. To not get you. Being an outlier shows that you contribute to society’s betterment before you may even know what your potential impact will be for years to come (it happens to many). But, staying aware of what keeps you grounded makes the reflection clearer. Nurturing and fostering a strong sense of self can help us stay on track to being part of something bigger than the perceptions of others. A sprinkle of daily gratitude doesn’t hurt either – as long as we know the only person we are ever in competition with is ourselves. 

Posted on by johanne_marais

Sleeping more and moving less? Thank the suprachiasmatic nucleus!

The winter solstice rolls us into the second half of the solar year. Trees surrender their fiery leaves to frozen dewdrops on bare branches. Shorter periods of daylight and longer portions of night lure thick socks and hot water bottles out from a deep drawer of winter clothes. Hearty stews simmer and fires frequently flicker as the season shifts. Animals seek warmth and reprieve from the cold by “… migration, hibernation and resistance (tolerance)”. For many humans, winter may burgeon these types of adaptations too, encouraging changes to our appetite, our exercise patterns, even our sleep and wakeful behaviours! Unpacking the physiology of this can help us be kinder to our bodies and minds for embracing our inner polar bears during winter months. So, allow me another moment of sleep science nerdery…

An intrinsic, 24-hour, regulatory system is present in each of our bodies. The system is called the circadian rhythm; internal oscillations that cycle around a biological clock. Some molecular mechanisms of the biological clock are retained across plant and animal kingdoms – from the most primitive single-cell organisms like cyanobacteria to human beings. In mammals, the circadian rhythmicity is observed in fluctuations of hormones, sleep-wake cycles and even periods of optimal cognitive functioning. Genetic variables of circadian rhythms are by no means conserved across species, and especially not within the same species.

Your 24-hour structure may differ from your housemate, sibling, or colleague by up to eight hours. This depends on microenvironments within and macroenvironments around the body. For example, your sibling, a shift worker who drives shipment trucks across the country, might wake up at two o’clock in the morning to arrive at their destination by four o’clock that afternoon. Their bedtime may be 6pm. At this time, a night nurse who clocked in at Rahima Moosa moments earlier may be enjoying his equivalent of a “morning coffee” and prepares to work through the night. How can this vary so vastly (and manageably) from person to person?

In brief, the answer is light and chemistry!

The circadian rhythm’s master-regulatory site is called the suprachiasmatic nucleus – a cluster of thousands of neuronal cells in the brain, situated on top of the optic chiasm. The suprachiasmatic nucleus (SCN) is receptive to photic stimulation (think: packages of light called photons sent via the visual system) and chemical (or, neurotransmitter) stimulation. The SCN’s sensitivity to light means that timely exposure to or limitation of daylight can shift the phase of our circadian rhythms; we can feel a desire to sleep earlier and wake up later, like with shift workers.

This is happening across the world as seasons change: a phase shift of circadian rhythm aligning with Earth’s orbital cycles and environmental cues. During winter, the sun sets about 90 minutes earlier than it would in warmer months – it may be a challenge to stay awake until your 11pm summer-bedtime. Similarly, the 5am Club may lose a few committed members (not mentioning any names erhuurhm @me) between May and August. Frankly, if the Sun can go to sleep earlier, so can I! This is an expected adaptation; a sign of your body adjusting well to its circumstance. No big deal!

It is also common for emotional affect to change in winter. Ever heard of Seasonal Affective Disorder? It’s basically the SADs that often come with less sunlight exposure. Our mental health is a huge determinant of our sleep-wake behaviours, too. People who live with a psychiatric illness (or even symptoms of one) are considerably more likely to experience coincident insomnia – up to 90% coincidence! This relationship, though, is no coincidence. Several molecular messengers involved in sleep, wakefulness, appetite control, and mood regulation are in the same class of neurotransmitters called monoaminergic neurotransmitters.

Just as animals do, humans may migrate smaller distances in winter: like, no further than to the snack stash and back. So, maybe we gather a little more belly fat. We don’t have that spring (haha, get it?) in our step. We want to sleep in… Guess what? Colder times of the year welcome a series of natural and protective evolutionary traits to be expressed and experienced. Sometimes that feels like seven extra centimetres between your skin and your belt buckle or admitting you simply must rest for 12 hours every day. Just as we do not look up at leafless trees nor look down at frost on the grass with judgement, there should be no shame around the physical, psychological, or physiological changes that come from seasons changing. If you’re sleeping more and moving less, give thanks to the suprachiasmatic nucleus!